This morning as I drove to work, I began to wonder why my husband is so willing to indulge my need to submit to him. Is it because he likes knowing he can *finally* have sex with me whenever he wants it? I'd be lying if I said I didn't think that was at least part of the equation. After so many years of almost no sex, he's not about to turn down this gift. There's more to it than that, though.
His car was pulling into the alley as I was leaving. I always like to be able to say good-bye in the mornings, but our opposing schedules often don't coincide like that. If he leaves the office just a few minutes late, I often need to leave before he arrives at home so I can arrive at my office on time. In order to satisfy myself, I called him after giving him a few minutes to get into the house.
I am truly fortunate. Some women couldn't or wouldn't be able to do this without totally freaking out their husband. For some couples, handing over this kind of control to one or the other would lead to sadism and violence. Some people would think it was gross or dirty or perverted.
My husband just took it all in stride. It may be because even after 30 years of being together, he still digs my body. No, it's not perfect. After three kids, it sags....sadly...EVERYWHERE. I'm prone to gain weight easily and while I lose it occasionally, it usually finds me again. (Perhaps I should move and not leave my fat a forwarding address the next time.) Then there is the supreme sacrifice my husband, a titty man, makes every time I diet. The twins, they shrivel up and go flat. I joke that when I put on a bra in the morning, I just roll each one up like a pair of socks and tuck them inside.
So, we've established that it's not because this naked and collared slave girl is a hottie that he loves me and my body. Love it, he does, though. At the moment, if not for my own health, he'd like me to lose a few pounds so that there are things we can experiment with sexually that simply aren't practical at the moment. Of course, one could argue that being a naked and collared slave girl isn't practical, either.
I asked him why he wanted to take this journey with me. Is it because finally, after decades of emasculating him, I actually WANT him to be the dominant one in our relationship? Is it because I've given him permission to enforce the slave rules, with spankings if necessary? Is it because the thought of all that turns him on? Is it that he likes ordering me to his bed and ordering me into the position he desires? Is it because he loves knowing that I'll suck his cock on command? Is because I will worship his cock willingly? (Cock worship entails at least an hour of kissing and nuzzling and licking and then sucking his cock.)
The simple answer to all of that is a resounding, "Yes!" It's all of that and it's none of that and it's more than that. Thankfully, it's more than just that we can easily spend 3 to 4 hours having sex. We've come up for air on occasion only to be stunned at how long we spent engaged in one another. The only drawback as I see it is that I have muscles currently in use that haven't been used this much....ever. There have been a few times when he's asked me to do something that we've had to rethink because some muscle or another is simply fatigued.
He's wise, my husband and master is. He's taking this with baby steps. He moves cautiously. He is enjoying our renewed relationship and he doesn't want a misstep to threaten what we're building. He knows that I have some history that makes some things dangerous from an emotional standpoint. He is constantly testing my limits, but gently. He mentions something. He listens to my response, either positive or negative. He tests the waters before moving forward with caution. He is patient. What other man would have lived so long with a minimum of sex? What other man would have stayed with his almost frozen wife without finding another sex partner?
He laughed this morning when I asked him about all of this. He said, "if you only knew how often I wanted to spank you...." I can only imagine. I can be frustrating. *I* wouldn't live with me.
This evening, when I returned home, he stripped me and then ordered me to his bed. Once there, his first order was to suck his cock. Today, it wasn't possible. At some time in our sex play over the last few days, I twisted a vertebra in my neck and that pinched a nerve. It wasn't terribly painful. That would have been bad enough. No, it was causing violent vertigo. Some people would say I'm dizzy anyway, but this was of the room spinning variety.
In the past, I would have shoved him out of MY room and told him to leave me alone. That didn't happen today. No, I didn't suck his cock. My neck wouldn't allow that much movement (don't ask how I drove home. I'm not entirely certain.) He got a frozen water bottle for me and then changed to a sexual position that required far less movement from me. He still spent over an hour just fucking me, pain and dizziness and all. At the end, he pulled out of my pussy. He ordered me to my knees. I must take his cock in my mouth and suck it the last few seconds and swallow his cum. In spite of bedspins, I obey.
Then he let me sleep for 45 minutes and we did it all over again. A slave girl doesn't dictate if she'll have sex, or when. This slave girl was just grateful that her Master didn't want her vomiting on his cock. This girl was grateful that Master still wanted to use her pussy and her ass for his pleasure. My Master's pleasure is my pleasure.
Thankfully, by late afternoon, the ice did its job, the swelling went down and the twisted vertebra shifted. 'Tis blessed NOT to have bed spins. THEN I sucked his cock.
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